Today I was collecting jumponium materials and suddenly it got dark, moon I was on traveled into shadow of the gas giant. I fell into deep pit and hardly managed to get up from there.

Then I managed to find some nice space crystals, I didn't even know those existed before!

I managed to witness total eclipse today

total eclipse timelapse, 20mins realtime

wonders of the universe!

System related: Gludgoea XN-G b25-6

Back to the bubble and right away making arrangements on an another expedition in to the void.

I discovered thing called guardian fsd booster which I definitely need and headed my trustworthy asp to 800ly away to some guardian burial grounds. I was able to get some of the required materials for the mod, but I still need to make another run to get some missing parts.

I feel confident and happy that I managed to resolve my inner pain and will continue on in female avatar, which brings another problem. How should I call myself and also, I need to decide how do I look. I have made several different designs and I simply cannot decide. I think this metamorphosis will need more time but I feel inner peace and happiness which I don't even remember having before!

Wish me luck!

I docked into Morgan's Rock yesterday after exhausting 3.7k ly flight and exploration. Went to a bar, got intoxicated and sunk into hotels comfortable bed.

I saw strange dreams that I morphed into cockroach and was chased by a rat. Then I morphed into a cat and chased the rat. There was intense drama about ending of the universe and in some point I morphed into female body.

...I'm feeling pretty strange now, I just remember how comfortable it was to be female and now I even started to play with avatar machine how I remember myself on that dream. I know its nothing special about sex on 34th century, but I have never thought about these things before. Maybe my fear of civilisation is just my inner conflict about my sex and nothing more.

This needs more consideration, I still have long way to home ahead.

More close to Sol I get, more and more uneasy I feel. Also my nightmares are back..

What is wrong with me? I felt briefly happy while 35k ly away from Sol, but now its only 10k and I'm already afraid of the civilization.

I stumbled upon long lost ruins of the guardians in some nebulae. I became very sad and understood that we only have limited time to live our lives and then we die.

Back to the bubble I say, I have some serious living to do!

I have seen Wolf-Rayet stars. I have seen black holes, smaller and super massive one. I have seen alien life. I have seen blue giant stars emetting hellish blue rays of death.

But yet I have been unable to find happiness in the universe, I'll keep looking but what I really miss is warm bed with Arturian whores...

Went to Sag A as planned, it wasnt anything like a void, too crowded place filled with tourists as myself.

I decided to head my ship into the unknown depths of the galaxy and I don't want to see anyone ever again.

I hope even aliens leave me alone!

I stopped by Jaques, bought my small cargo space full of rares. Later I got drunk and slept over hangover.

I hate civilisation, void is calling my name so off I went.

Currently I'm resting and wondering the meaning of all these hot balls of glowing gas.

I slept and dreamed about that space was disappearing, big invisible monster was eating everything away star by star. I was trying to jump away from it but I didn't succeed. I woke up when universe was just a tunnel and I was falling in.

Does my dreams mean something, or am I just going mad?

Maybe its the fear of the mighty Sagittarius A, at least now I know I have to go and see it myself.